There are a couple of people I suggest thinking about over your Good Mood Diet cup of hot chocolate tonight. (Yes, for newbies, the GMD does call for – let’s say requires – you to drink a cup of hot cocoa before bed; just use a brand that does not contain Dutch chocolate or is not "dutched," or processed with alkali).
One of those people is Hugh Prather. He is a Lutheran minister and author of more than a dozen books based in Tucson. One title I highly recommend is Prather's "Spiritual Notes to Myself." During an extended interview I had with Prather for that book release in 1998, he talked about a nightly ritual he used with his wife and two then-teenage kids.
"We lay on the big bed in our bedroom," said Prather, referring to the room and bed he shared with his wife, Gayle, who has co-authored some of the books covering life choices, meditation, stress relief and spirituality. "Each of us takes turns talking about the best part of our day and the worst part of our day. We do it every night. It's a great way for the kids to let out some problem they might be having at school or with a friend. Truth is, my wife and I benefit from it too. We can let go of our problems and troubling issues."
Perhaps even better, the nightly family laydown provided the Prathers an unabashed opportunity to celebrate the good things in everyone's day. We can forget to celebrate the small victories sometimes.
While I don't recommend drinking those GMD hot cocoas in bed, you might try finding a cozy spot in the house – or outside as the spring nights permit – and using the Best and Worst strategy as you sip.
If there are nights when a family gab is not possible, then maybe James Pennebaker has the best approach. He is a University of Texas researcher who has conducted a number of studies that show writing journal pages can help us heal from physiological conditions. His work clearly shows that healing can come in both physical and emotional forms, opening up the journal option to any of us who need some healing and repair (uh, yes, that would be pretty much all of us).
Pennebaker suggests writing about your deepest feelings, whether hurt, grief, depression or, on a brighter note, joy and passion. His research shows that people who write about feelings will boost their immune system while dampening the effects of stress hormones.
Some of us find it hard to write as a habit. Maybe we can't think of the just-right way to express our feelings. To that end, keep in mind the GMD motto that "you don't have to be perfect or even close to it." That should make the writing go easier and the hot chocolate taste even better.
Bob Condor